There are certain text messages that bring me certain energies and last night was no different.
She doesn’t ask to “talk” to me, THAT was a red flag.
I began to feel some kind of way but what I heard I wasn’t ready to hear or shall I say, prepared to hear.
The lyracist said that it is filled with swift transitions.
I read that it is like a vapor.
I heard that it is pieces of our life’s puzzle.
I realize it comes with many cracks.
I understand that our roads are not straight and narrow but winding.
Life happens if we are ready or not; prepared or not; want it to or not.
Life is filled with many emotions, feelings, moments, anxieties as well as anticipatories.
Life is beautiful and it can break us.
No matter what, life is nothing without genuine and loving people to share it.
We talk about mental illness, mental anguish, mental fatigue. I want my friend whose entire life is to assure people not drown to take this hard road she must walk (NOT ALONE) and take it is as an opportunity to highlight mental illness.
We all approach life differently but the issues, heartache, pain and worries affect us all basically the same but our coping mechanism is what distinguishes us.
Some people can get the help and support for their mental illness.
Some people don’t have the time to deal with their mental illness.
Some people deny their mental illness.
Some people are totally confused.
My prayer is that she takes up ALL space where they are discussing mental health.
My prayer is that she will MOTHER even in this season.
My prayer is that she will not shrink, be silent or feel some kind of way and kick down ALL the doors and take up AS MUCH TIME AND SPACE she needs.
My prayer is that as straight as her posture is when talking about her love of the water, she will be and do the same on mental illness.
My prayer is that she knows and understand the depth of my love for us, support of and belief in her.
My prayer is that she knows that I have a shoulder readily available and whatever she need, she need not question if I will be there and I mean whatever.
Seeing her last night did me well but it isn’t about me but a friend is a friend through it all.
She taught me what friends do, what a friend resemble and how a friend show up and speak up for a friend. A friend really do love at all times and in any season.
This women did the world for her children, there was no need that went unmet.
As a friend, it put a smile on my face because we see mothering differently because well, we live in America.
As I go down memory lane and recall our conversations of her wishes, dreams, desires, attempts and hope of her children; I smile.
SHE PUT THE WORLD ON PAUSE WHEN IT CAME TO HER CHILDREN!
My friend deserves unconditional love and from me she has always had it.
I could write a book about how magnificent, brilliant, loyal, caring, giving, selfless, supportive, genuine, loving, she is (AND I DID) but then I thought, this sorry place would steal her story and claim it as its own as it has always done.
That’s how special she is to me.
I cherish her and who she is to me.
I have such a guilty feeling with this, there has got to be a balance with this racism, stuff.
DAMN!
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